Some try to re-create the liberty of summer break by using the hot months to experiment with other kinds of freedoms, namely: style and fashion. This can be deadly because it is in the summer that we see the creation and demonstration of some of the most regrettable style blunders.
The following trends from this summer need to be retired…for good.
- High-waisted, short jean shorts. You know, the kind with fly buttons that reach way higher than necessary. Statement-making? Yes. Potential to create camel-toe? Definitely. Avoid this look at all costs because it is unflattering as well as likely to be harmful to the body.
2. Extreme headbands. I’m not talking about the cute ones with small flowers or bows on one side. Here, I’m thinking about large, ostentatious feathers paired with a veil that drapes dramatically over one eye. Perfect for Lady Gaga during a performance, but troublesome for the Average Jane to see clearly when only one eye is usable. I wouldn’t trust a girl wearing a headband like this to take the wheel or send emails: disaster could follow in either situation.
3. Gladiator sandals that buckle all the way up the calf. While these may have been beneficial in the Roman Coliseum for actual gladiators, they serve us no purpose in the real world. Unless that girl in the cubicle down the hall wants to rumble…rawr.
4. Rompers. I do not have much of an argument against these one-piece ensembles except for the following: I am not a baby, a toddler, or an infant, and therefore I do not wear rompers.
So there you have it. Now that we’ve confessed our summer style sins, recognized the errors of our ways, and vowed to do better, we can march forward into fall with a clean slate. So make way, ladies: I’ve got to sort through my summer fashion blunders with some serious retail therapy.
Editor’s note: qwp is a little bit more lenient on the gladiator sandals and the jumpsuits. She is, however, more than happy to see Katy Perry’s ridiculous publicity-stunt romper antics “fall back.”
