politi-couture for the urbane sophisticate
Since an organization that has within its bylaws specific limitations on allowing fully white men and women into it is definitely not racist, the NAACP will be voting on a resolution to official call out those of the Tea Party Movement “racist.” This is a good use of time and resources.
From FoxNEWS:
Nation’s leading civil rights group is poised to decide on a resolution to condemn the Tea Party movement as racist, despite claims from Tea Partiers that the measure is just a political ploy.
A succinctly written open letter by @majorphilebrity, a talented black Athens, Georgia socialite who hates self-enforced stereotypes. Via Dear Celebrity BET:
Dear BET,
In eve of your upcoming 10th award show, I thought it would be a perfect time to outline all of my problems with you. It seems once a year that “successful” black people gather together in a 3 hour live massacre of the last shreds of dignity black people have in the mainstream media; by showing that we indeed are a bunch wild thing-a-ma*iggers no matter what our net worth. How such public genocide has gone unpunished is shocking. To call it an award show is laughable, but I guess “parade of the wealthy little black sambos” wouldn’t go over too well with the networks. There are a few key mistakes that are made every year that I would like to address first and foremost because I don’t have time to address them all without getting carpal tunnel.
1. Stop insulting gays, it happens oftens and most recently last year when the presenter said “ladies and ladies ONLY please make noise for Maxwell”. Do you think his voice got that high from smoking weed?? sorry, he’s a catcher. Also Queen Latifah and Alicia Keys are shining beacons of hope for our community and MEGA lesbians so “let them eat cake.”
2. STOP giving awards to Beyonce. She clearly HATES them. Last year her speech sounded less enthusiastic and excited than Mary Kate Olsen does ordering at a drive thru window. I honestly don’t blame her though. I bet it’s hard for her to fake appreciation with the deadly smell of spam sandwiches, old spice aftershave and Hennessy burning her nostrils. I wonder how many hotel maids are proud owners of Beyonce’s “lost” BET awards? Hmmm anyway
3. Stop picking the most vulgar rap artists to perform!!! It’s already bad enough that we have to endure Fantasia’s embarrassment in front of a TelePrompTer, but it doesn’t help the case that each rap performance sounds like a song produced by Stephen Hawkings voice machine.
4. Have a REHEARSAL!! Every year people walk out on that stage like they don’t even know they were supposed to be there. It’s a f-cking disaster. I think Gabby Sidibe looks more organized trying to soap between her “shoulder blades?”
5. GET A DRESS CODE!!!! I know implementing such a rule would automatically take Keri Hilson off the invite list, but who cares? Let her stand alone outside in the puddle of her own piss and mediocrity…it’s where she belongs. But honestly, when people show up to your award show with ashy elbows, white Tees, and KFC double downs on the red carpet…I think it’s safe to say the show loses some of it’s credibility.
I really think this list of grievances is short and reasonable. I don’t think Harry Potter could wave his wand hard enough to make this show a success, but if you at least follow these few guidelines I might be able to make it halfway through without the taste of Franks hot sauce and a craving for Pork n’ Beans taking over my mouth.
Sincerely,
Phillip
@majorphilebrity
I graduated college ’09 and within one year we have a student from my alma mater spotlighted on CNN and now Kappa Alpha Order is banning confederate flag iconography despite its historical roots in such imagery.
Yahoo! reports:
“BIRMINGHAM, Ala. – A college fraternity inspired by Confederate Gen. Robert E. Lee has banned members around the country from wearing Confederate uniforms to “Old South” parties and parades after years of complaints that the tradition was racially insensitive.
The Virginia-based Kappa Alpha Order issued new rules to chapters earlier this year saying members aren’t allowed to wear Rebel uniforms to parties or during their parades, which are a staple on campuses across the South.
The decision, announced in an internal memo posted on the group’s website, followed a flap last year at the University of Alabama in Tuscaloosa, where a black sorority complained after a KA parade stopped in front of its house on campus. KA members were dressed in the gray uniforms of Confederate officers, and young women wore hoop skirts.”
Shocker. The WSJ writes:
“The Obama administration has asked a federal appeals court to uphold a race-conscious admissions system at the University of Texas at Austin, aiming to stymie a lawsuit that conservatives hope will spur the Supreme Court to limit affirmative action at public colleges.”
On the plus side, at least you can’t blame the Obama Administration for being hypocritical in this aspect. We wouldn’t want minorities to earn admission based on any actual merit; that wouldn’t have worked out well for the White House. Honorable!
So is anything real about these people besides their love for the tanning bed and flashing their snatches whenever possible? Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi and Jenny “JWOWW” Farley are actually pretty far from Italian. The diminutive self-proclaimed “guidette” Snooki is actually Chilean, while skunk stripes McGee JWOWW is Spanish and Irish.
On the plus side, we can start respecting Italians once again. At least the women.
According to the Wall Street Journal, man cleavage, otherwise known as heavage, is so hot right now. Throwback to the disco era, or cultural revolution? The man chest look is touted to be to be inspired by “the unabashed machismo of Latin American men.”
The article sites actors including “True Blood” star Mehcad Brooks, who rocks the heavage look, in addition to “Gossip Girl” dandy Ed Westwick and Jude Law, as pioneers of this Latin-influenced look.
There’s a delicate balance to the hair-to-skin ratio, so men are taking to waxing to keep things looking smooth and manly(ish). Yum.
Anyone who lives in DC know the Salahis are known to be stingy and broke, but now they’re crashing the White House as part of their skillful PR campaign for themselves to showcase their whirlwind and glamorous lifestyle. Unfortunately for them, they have some legal messiness to tend to, and it isn’t just because they crashed federal property and threw the Secret Service under a bus.
The Real Housewives stars (wait–isn’t Tareq a male?) have quite a few skeletons in the closet, including debt, unfiled taxes, and suing of various relatives. And, oh yeah, they aren’t even shooting the episodes in their own house, rumor has it. Oops.
For a somewhat complete list of legal/ethical/mostly hilarious issues, check out CNN’s post about the Salahis.
So here’s a question: in the day and age of hyper-political correctness, one has to wonder a few things. The White House should be privy to the most advanced security in the world. After all, the Savior, aka President Obama, is housed there, along with an inspirational organic veggie garden and Sasha Fierce and Malia. Would crashers with much less, ahem, exotic names gotten access to the Chosen One and his recession-aloof Thanksgiving Dinner? Just a thought…
19 years of litigation has seemingly come to an end for a group of Native American activits who were turned down yesterday by the Supreme Court regarding their challenge to the Washington Redskins’ racially charged name.
SCOTUS declined without comment, meaning a lower court’s ruling will stand. The Native American activists said that the Washington football team’s nickname was so offensive that it did not deserve to be trademarked.
The Redskins have adamantly maintained that their team name is a tribute to the Native Americans, not intended to be offensive in any way.
decade legal challenge by Native American activists to the nickname of the Washington Redskins came to a close Monday when the Supreme Court declined to review the group’s last loss in federal courts.
The justices declined without comment to reconsider a lower court’s ruling that the activists waited too long to bring their assertion that the nickname is so racially offensive that it does not deserve trademark protection.
“Obviously, we’re quite pleased; it’s been a long road,” said Robert Raskopf, a lawyer for the team since the suit was first filed in 1992. “We’re not surprised the court didn’t see any issue worthy of review.”
Philip Mause, who represented the challengers, said the activists were “disappointed” by the court’s decision but not yet resigned to accept defeat. A new group of challengers has filed the same trademark cancellation suit in hopes that their slightly different circumstances can avoid the procedural bar that halted this case.
Raskopf said the team is not worried about the new complaint. “I think we’re very confident with our likelihood of success,” he said.
Through the years, the team has steadfastly defended the use of the Redskins nickname as honoring Native Americans, not disparaging them. When based in Boston, the team was known as the Boston Braves and was renamed in 1933 as the Redskins. The team said in its brief to the court that t
Thanks Obama! This makes Americans look so educated. Everyone knows Asian people always bow, only eat rice, and own laundromats. That reminds me, I need to get more Kabuki makeup before I go home for Thanksgiving. Don’t want to disappoint the relatives!
Pamela Eyring, the president of The Protocol School of Washington, said this of Obama’s symbolic gesture of America’s hegemonic decline: “It isn’t correct for a chief of state to bow to another chief of state. It’s not appropriate. He should not be bowing to other chiefs of state.”
According to a recent poll done by Gallup,the number of African-Americans who believe Obama has had a positive impact on race relations has dropped by eight percent since last summer, to 42%. With whites, which inexplicably is a category despite African-Americans getting a much more PC group name, optimism has dropped from 60% to 59%.
“In short, despite all that has happened in the intervening decades, there is scarcely more hope now than there was those many years ago that the nation’s race-relations situation will be solved,” Gallup said.
The survey also turned out the result that 82% of whites believe that blacks have as good a chance as whites in their community to succeed, which was echoed by only 49% of blacks who felt that way.
Gallup also said:
“Despite the election of the first black president in U.S. history, Americans’ optimism about a solution to the race problem in the U.S. and their views about the prevalence of racism against blacks are not substantially more positive now than they have been in previous years. .. blacks remain significantly more negative than whites about their status in society and about the potential for an eventual solution to the race problem.”
Obama’s “impact” couldn’t be because he acted stupidly, could it?
